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19twentythree | January 17, 2018

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Humanity at its Worst

February 29, 2016 | Hadeel El Deeb
Humanity at its Worst

We judge, we complain, we argue about the pettiest things; we enjoy our selfishness and practice it perfectly yet certainly make sure we criticize everyone around us for it. We hunt for the heck of it and brag about our big egos that played a role in making it happen; and some other times, we hunt to devour and indulge in what we caught. We boast about our sophisticated taste buds that can tell the difference between gourmet meat and just any other piece of flesh as we talk about animal rights and the inhumane ways of killing them. We find excuses for every off-putting habit we have and a lot of times, we are proud of the irresponsible and hasty judgments we have of people, and have no problem sharing them with everyone else. We talk about our closest people and strangers alike; we gossip about them and retell their stories like they were our own. We have no shame in pretending our best friends are our “siblings by choice” but once they turn their backs, we proudly unleash the cynical and egotistic in us turning those friends into the smallest most insignificant beings that ever lived. We continue to justify our means to an end, regardless of how it could all affect those involved, and we blame it on “survival.” We claim to believe in fate and what the universe has in store for us, but we also can’t get enough of what we so greedily want. We confuse ambition with greediness, generosity with showing off, survival with selfishness, caring with hypocrisy, desires with needs, and genuine love with disposable lust.


We walk this earth with an unprecedented sense of entitlement and treat every other species, including versions of our own, with so much vengeance, self-centeredness, and careless attitudes. We believe our own made-up stories and spend most of our lives trying to justify actions we take to “fix” those created scenarios and find a way out of them. We hate ourselves and end up turning the world upside down because of our self-generated hatred. We say we know what we want but we spend everyday asking ourselves the same rhetorical questions as we lose our paths trying to find answers only to make ourselves feel better. We learned that blaming everything around us is easier than facing reality and looking at things as they really are.


When we choose to have pets, we tend to forget that we are choosing “companions” for life and instead end up exercising our obsession to control helpless beings that want nothing but love and who will continue giving nothing but unconditional love, because that’s the only way they know how to live.


We come across rare humans with big genuine hearts, and we manage to step all over them too because we don’t know how to be gentle anymore. If we can’t even be gentle with ourselves, how could we appreciate or even understand true kindness.


We have managed to turn beautiful nature into an ugly work of art that continuously strives to break free from our human cruelty. We pluck flowers, burn down forests, kill trees, choose cement over greenery, pollute in every way possible, then try to find ways to bring it all back to life again through our eco-friendly initiatives.


Stories of massacres and ongoing fights for land have ceased to be shocking. Bombings are no longer surprising if the numbers of those killed or injured are not in hundreds or thousands. We turn a blind eye because it’s easier than doing something about it; we wait for those in authority to act while we know very well they are the true initiators. We live ever so passively because it’s easier to say we are “too sensitive” than to actually turn emotions into productive actions.


We love plastic money and have no problem spending what we don’t have. We say we hate how money and power shatter everything and turn greed into crime, but we can’t seem to live without being in debt only to fill more void and find meaning in and to life.


We make more life and bring more of us into this world then complain that they are taking up too much of our time and stopping us from living. We decide to have kids then give them a hard time for wanting to enjoy a life we gave them without them asking for it. We blame them for how we aged, for our “long lost interests” that we had to sacrifice so we’d raise them “right”, we deny them their right to choose only because we want them to live our way. We put our own kids into guilt-trips as we forget the very reason they were brought into this ugly world.


We wreck friendships, relationships, marriages, and parenthood because we are never satisfied and we always want it all. We want to share a life with one companion but we also cheat because we suddenly don’t believe in monogamy; we want a single life so we can be with this guy and that girl but we also feel alone because none of it is enough. We wreck others’ relationships because they seem to have what we don’t. Envy fills our hearts and jealousy takes over our thoughts. We take what’s not ours and claim we “earned” it then we throw it all away because it’s no longer an exciting challenge.


We lie because we can then we cry because we feel guilty, then we do it all over again and say “I’m sorry, I’m only human.”


We always find creative ways to blame the weaker ones; we are all guilty of one thing or the other. We are all sick beings one way or another. We all sin differently, and that’s just how it is.


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