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It’s not a disability, it’s a different ability

June 9, 2015 | Salma Cherif, Laila Mohamed, Myrna Zaki, Alexandra Nabil, Jailan Olama, Darine Hesham and Nancy Mostafa
It’s not a disability, it’s a different ability
Anisat/SXC

For the first time in her life she saw the resemblance between her and her older son in his behavior and the challenges he faces. She, as well, was fidgety, and easily distracted. Getting something for her mother from another room across the house was challenging because as soon as she stepped inside the room she would have forgotten what she was there for. Always a troublemaker she was, or at least this is how she was perceived as at school.

What she found out later is that genes can influence more than just her baby’s looks.

All of that is part of 38-year-old psychologist Passant El-Kotoury’s character and what identifies her. A counselor at a private school in fifth settlement, she feels that her role in helping the kids at school is a noble thing to do and hopes that her kids would find the same treatment everywhere. As a wife and a mother of two boys it is challenging to balance between her work and private life. But it’s even more challenging doing so all the while dealing with the peculiarity her older son, Omar’s situation. What helps her succeeding in all her roles is most probably that uniqueness in her character that she shares with Omar.

What she and her son, Omar, have in common is having ADHD; Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.

Ever since Omar was two years old his mother started noticing that his behavior is different than other children his age. Being a psychologist and suffering ADHD herself, she could spot the signs even at that early age.

Omar, now 10, is unique, El-Kotoury says. He has difficulties in passing written exams as he easily gets distracted and bored. And although he never means to be rude, his logic and confidence often lead him to trouble. One day Omar was calling out his teacher several times in class, but she neglected him. As he had to gain her attention in any possible way, and through logic and his consequential thinking, he decided to stand up and shut off the projector the teacher was working with because that would be the only way she would give him her attention. As a result, Omar was sent out of class. He decided to go to the school’s principal and explain his point, again, through logic.

Despite his impulsivity, inattentiveness and hyperactivity, his parents always encouraged him to believe in himself and be ambitious. He started work when he was eight and soon enough he developed a sense of financial management. He also excels in physical activities.

Explaining ADHD

ADHD is categorized into three different types: Hyperactive-impulsive, inattentive and a combined type, the most common. In order to diagnose a child with ADHD or ADD, he must have at least six symptoms and display them in various settings.

Each type has its own symptoms, for example, an inattentive kid is always daydreaming, tends to lose their personal belongings and gets easily distracted. A hyperactive kid, on the other hand, is always moving, cannot stay still for a long time, tends to cross streets without checking the traffic, cannot wait for their turn and talks excessively and quickly.

According to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), seven is the average age of ADHD diagnosis. Due to a high level of awareness and knowledge about ADHD in the U.S., diagnosis of ADHD has been improving during the past 10 years; rising from 7.8% in 2003 to 9.5% in 2011. On the other hand, there are no official statistics on ADHD cases in Egypt.

ADHD determines various of aspects in life. In school, ADHD kids are often referred to as “troublemakers and stupid,” says El-Kotoury. The society also labels them as “impolite” due to their impulsive actions, reactions or sometimes aggressiveness. Being labeled, they start feeling bad about themselves, which then destroys their self-esteem. “Until when am I going to be looked at as impolite and rude?” Omar once told his mother, El-Kotoury. Having ADHD makes it difficult for a child to sustain things, such as tasks or even friendships. “I never get the chance to meet a friend over coffee for some chatter because as much as I am friends with everyone, I do not have one close friend,” said El-Kotoury’s when asked if ADHD sufferers can easily make friends.

It is easy to misjudge ADHD sufferers and call them rude, and ultimately they will conform with this label and become it, said El-Kotoury, until eventually the only solution left to deal with them is punishment and aggressive responses. But the key to dealing with ADHD sufferers is through solving problems and facing all challenges together to win their trust. Diagnosing ADHD early on means far better chances for improvement. Hania Sedky suffers from ADD and since she was diagnosed as a kid, her mother used to help her draw and color to train her to concentrate and develop better attention. All of that brought her to where she is today; Sedky is the doodling team head at Art Khana Organization.

Look out for the symptoms:

Signs of Inattention ADHD

  • Difficulty in attending to details
  • Difficulty sustaining attention 
  • Making careless mistakes
  • Difficulty organizing themselves, their tasks or their personal belongings
  • Frequently misplacing items
  • Easily distracted and frequently interrupting tasks
  • Frequently shifts from one task to the other without completing it
  • Frequently shifts conversations and trouble listening to others

Signs of Hyperactivity ADHD

  • Being constantly fidgety and squirmy
  • Inability to sit still and constantly getting up
  • Running excessively, even at inappropriate times, and being restless
  • Talking excessively 
  • Difficulty engaging in quiet activities or relaxing

Signs of Impulsivity ADHD

  • Difficulty awaiting their turn
  • Speaking at inappropriate times
  • Being generally impatient
  • Rushing to answer before the question was completed
  • Frequently interrupting others
  • Difficulty taking the time to answer or think through

Bear in mind that the child needs to display these symptoms in several settings and not just a specific one. So if you child has these same traits at school, at home and in other places, speak to a specialist to see if he might be suffering from ADHD.

El-Kotoury concludes, “You must know your child’s talents and never wish that he or she would be just like you one day; I can never stop my child from developing his strengths as long as he does not cross any boundaries… Get to know your child’s uniqueness and make sure to use it in the right place. Creating love and logic is extremely important.”

Editor’s note: If you need advice in dealing with ADHD kids visit the Learning Resource Center (Building number 9, Road 278, New Maadi, Cairo. Tel.: +202 2516-3965 or (0122) 233-2809) or get in touch with Counseling Psychologist, Dr. Passant El Kotoury (Apartment number 4, building number146, Road 46, fifth district, Fifth Settlement. Tel.: (0127) 852-9814).


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